dead

2 of 5 Walking-Dead Stars – Killing The Dead by Richard Murray.

This novella is just a very poor episode of The Walking Dead. Hell, they even end up in an old farm house, just like The Walking Dead.

Of course, in this story, we have a serial killer named Ryan as our narrator. Oh, nifty! It’s like totally original, right? Well, considering he’s actually compared to Dexter in this story, because of Ryan’s so-called code of killing, it’s really not so original. Because, Ryan doesn’t kill just anybody. He only kills people who deserve it. Oh, and zombies, of course. Just like Dexter!

The problem is, this story doesn’t have any of the depth of character as even the worst of The Walking Dead episodes. I spent the entire time reading this story, hoping they would all die a horrible death. I kept thinking, maybe they will die while getting burned alive, while being eaten by zombies, while being raped by hung black guys.

One can only hope, right? Oh, and don’t get me started on this guy’s use of the word ‘whilst’, as in: “Cover me, whilst I chop at these zombies with my cleaver.” Or, “Whilst I gathered canned goods, the girls were busy cooking upstairs.” Or, “Whilst I jack off in this girl’s face, make sure to take a selfie, at just the right moment, whilst I ejaculate.”

Okay, sure, I know this story is set in London, or somewhere in Britain, but come on man. The word has its uses, I’m sure, but not in every goddamn paragraph, for fuck’s sake.

Please excuse me, whilst I wipe me bum with this stupid story.

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