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3 of 5 Stars – Samantha by K  Morris.

I’m not a fan of how British people write. Since I’m just a retarded American, by ‘British’, I mean anyone who lives in Europe. They spell things weird. They use different punctuation. They say “I went to University” or “I went to Hospital”. I’m sorry, but that shit ain’t right. It’s “the University” or “the hospital”, you limey fucks.

That’s really my biggest complaint about this story. All the Britishness kept shining through, and it distracted me from the story. Frankly, it pissed me off. Because the story is about a hot-ass whore in Liverpool. Sure, she isn’t a whore by choice, but who is, really. Most girls don’t long to be a whore when they grow up. They’re thrust (heh, I said ‘thrust’) into the profession in one way or another.

That was the first, but not the last cliche in this story. Like, oh noes, will her non-John boyfriend find out that she’s a whore? Of course he will. But will he just forgive her, so they can get on with their lovely life? Will they fall in love, get married, have little whore babies? No fucking way. She’s a whore, for fuck’s sake.

But she’s also practically royalty. Her father is a goddamn lord. Can you believe that shit? A lord has a whore for a daughter. Sweet. I bet he’s really proud. Probably sent her to the best whore school. Hired her a good whore tutor. Helped her with her whore homework. Okay, that’s a bit gross.

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Comments
  1. A little British does, indeed, go a long way.
    (Did that sound too British?)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. LOL. I read from a lot of old books in elementary school, so now I put a “u” in everything… 🙂

    Like

  3. Thank you for taking the time to read and review Samantha. I appreciate it. Regards. Kevin

    Like

  4. […] I submitted my request for a review on Friday 6 February and on the evening of Monday 9 February received a helpful email from Glenn informing me that he had reviewed Samantha and providing links to the review, (https://ghbooks.wordpress.com/2015/02/09/samantha-is-a-dirty-whore/). […]

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Just saying but don’t Americans say, ‘I went to school’ by which confusingly they mean, ‘I went to university’?

    And how does one tell the difference between going to school (school) and school (university)?

    Do you really use the definite article for something non-specific. Surely not? I would however say, ‘I went to the University of Liverpool’.

    Liked by 2 people

    • gegrizzle says:

      Well, I would say I went to college. Just like I would say I went to school. Because those are non-specific terms. To me, University means something specific.

      Like

      • There’s no difference. They are all places of education.
        I went to school. I went to the Girls’ High.
        I went to university. I went to Liverpool University or, as above, the University of …
        But if I said I went to the university, the immediate question from someone would be ‘which university?’

        I’m totally puzzled. But luckily most Americans just call everything school and it’s just a question of working out whether they are talking about at five years old or at twenty-one.

        Liked by 1 person

      • gegrizzle says:

        I agree there’s no real difference. It just annoys me. 😛

        Like

      • This debate about whether one should use school when one means university makes me smile. I have met people other than Americans who use school when they mean university or a further education college. It can, as Kate says be somewhat confusing working out what kind of educational institution is being referred to. Anyway it is all part of life’s rich tapestry!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. gegrizzle says:

    No, it’s all an evil European plot, to annoy the world! hehehe 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Mike Finn says:

    How charmingly American: “The Hospital” and “The University”. It must be a race memory of when you had only one. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • gegrizzle says:

      heh yeah, that’s it. The hospital is the one you are going to visit as in “I’m going to visit grandma at the hospital” Just like “I’m going to the store.” etc. You British freaks are just wrong. lolz. 😛

      Like

  8. Pardon the silly question, but what has your religious ramblings got to do with Glen’s review of my story “Samantha? You are a spammer and should confine your ramblings to relevant posts rather than hijacking posts which have no relevance to your ideas.

    Liked by 1 person

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