Buried Within – isn’t as gay as I’d hoped

3 of 5 Not-Nearly-Gay-Enough Stars – Buried Within by Pete Deakon.

From the cover of this book, I expected it to be some sort of gay love-fest. With hot young guys fucking in the forest, beside the road. But unfortunately, that’s not what this book is. In fact, there’s absolutely no gay butt-banging in this book. So sad.

Instead of highway butt-bandits, this book has a murder mystery. And a love story. It’s funny to me that the love story part is every man’s fantasy. You see an absolutely beautiful woman across the bar. You walk up to her and say, “Wow. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Mind having dinner with me?”

That’s a fantasy, because that would never work. Unless the guy was also some hot hunk. Then, there’s really no need for pleasantries at all. Just, “Hey, lets fuck.” And so it goes. But with some average Joe? No fucking way. That shit don’t work.

It’s much more likely that the woman would give you a disgusted look and say something like, “Seriously? Did you just say that? Did you really think that would work? Get out of my face, faggot.”

But no. This beautiful woman takes his compliment in stride, and says some bullshit like, “You think I’m beautiful? Really? How sweet. Of course I’ll have dinner with you.” Please. Right there, this book took me out of a plausible story, and into fantasy land. Life is just never that simple.

So this random guy, and this hot chick have a wonderful life together. Everything is perfect. Then, some other random guy kills the beautiful girl. Because he’s crazy, or something. He saw her in a store, and thought, “Hey, I wonder what would happen if I asked that girl out on a date?”

But in crazy-boy’s world, reality kicks in. He knows he’d just get slapped upside the fucking head. This girl isn’t gonna give him the time of day. So, why bother asking her out? Just bash her face in with a hammer, and have your way with her. Okay, maybe not the face. Then, you’d have to put a bag over her head when you banged her corpse. We don’t want that, now do we?

Poor random guy is so sad when he finds out his wife got killed. So he quits his job, and goes after the killer himself, because apparently, the cops in his town are a complete fucking waste of space.

This is a decent book. It’s well written, and has some interesting characters. I only wish there was more killing. I mean, only one decapitation? Come on, man…

Visit me at Goodreads and Follow me on Twitter & Facebook