Days of Throbbing Gristle – it’s what he calls his penis

Posted: March 5, 2015 in 2 Star Reviews, Fiction, Young Adult
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

0days

2 of 5 Throbbing-Gay-Cock Stars – Days of Throbbing Gristle by Kevin Cole.

I don’t know why, but when I read young adult fiction from a guy’s perspective, it always seems like they’re just whiny little bitches. Like Catcher in the Rye. A whiny ass bitch. It’s Kind of a Funny Story, yet another whiny ass bitch. And this book follows that same trend. Why? I have no fucking idea.

I mean, seriously… Why the fuck can’t authors write about interesting characters? Why do they always have to be whiny ass bitches? It’s fucking stupid. It’s even more stupid, when it’s 800 some pages of whiny ass bitch, which is what this book is.

It’s the story of some young English faggot, who travels to Texas as an exchange student. He doesn’t waste any time. He starts sucking dick right away. Cuz that’s how you do it in Texas, apparently. I might have to visit that fine state some day.

The young lad decides that he’s not 100% gay, and goes looking for a girlfriend. This is a hard (heh, I said ‘hard’) thing to do, when the whole community has first hand knowledge of your fine dick-sucking abilities. Word gets around, man.

So he cries like a little girl, because nobody will love him. He smokes a bowl, snorts some coke, drinks some beers, and sucks some more cock. Because hey man, stick with what you’re good at.

Somewhere along the line, he comes to the conclusion that love is bullshit. Because everyone is just out for themselves. Girls just want to be popular. They want to drink, and get high, and hang out with the cutest guys. Guys, on the other hand, just want to get laid. Period. Nothing fancy. Just gimme some goddamn pussy.

But love? There is no love. At least there’s none to be had for this poor English faggot. Because lets face it, nobody wants to hang out and get drunk with a whiney ass bitch.

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Comments
  1. gegrizzle says:

    This review got removed from goodreads because they said it was “too homophobic”. LMAO. If anything it’s homophiliac in nature. It cracks me up, the things people take offense to. It’s also making me giggle like a schoolgirl, because it means that the author probably got all butthurt from this review. Oh happy day! lolz

    Like

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