The Girl on the Train – is a drunken whore

2 of 5 Gone-Girl-On-A-Train Stars – The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins.

This book is just a goddamn soap opera. This chick banged that dude. That dude cheated with that whore. And OMG two chicks are doing it. Sweet.

But then comes the revenge. Everyone has to get revenge, right? Some guy finds out his wife is cheating, so he starts banging some other chick. But of course that chick is married too. So her husband goes out and bangs yet another chick. And so begins the endless cycle of revenge fucks.

This book is about an ugly fat bitch who rides the train every day, and sees people living their perfect lives, in their perfect little neighborhood. After a while, she gets tired of being a spectator, and inserts herself into the perfect people’s lives. She pretends to be the wife’s friend, or something.

Then some guy gets sick and tired of his cheating whore of a wife. That bitch just can’t see reason, man. She just won’t shut the fuck up. On and on with the nagging. So he bashes her head in with a rock, as you do. And then the fun begins…

After the head bashing, this book turns into a cheap rip-off of Gone Girl. Because the dude’s wife goes missing, and of course he’s their prime suspect. But wait, maybe she’s not missing at all. Maybe she’s just sick and tired of this sociopath asshole, and ran off, or something. Yeah, ya think? Maybe.

Then there’s some shit about someone’s unwanted baby that they buried at the beach. Because babies are fucking annoying. All that goddamn screaming! Shut up, you stupid cunt baby! I’m trying to jack it to some lezbo porn here, and you’re just ruining the mood.

In the end, I don’t understand why this book is so popular. They’ll probably make it into a goddamn movie, just like fucking Gone Girl. I don’t know why, because it’s pretty much the same goddamn story. Only with more cheating cunts and asshole husbands. Okay, wait… I might actually watch that.

Visit me at Goodreads and Follow me on Twitter & Facebook